Yes, I'm THAT mom.

I'm quickly becoming known as the totally disheveled mom at my kids school.

Here is one reason why.

Sunday night 11:00pm, I realize it is my week to send snacks for Bretts class. It's 11:00 though and I'm in my P.J.'s and not about to get out of the house.

Fast forward to the next morning. Everyone is trying to get their breakfast, and in line at the toaster. Kids need things signed, need backpacks...have to let the dog out, baby is crying and sitting in high chair without food in front of her. Total chaos, you get it.

I realize oh crap, I have snack. I glance in the pantry and realize I have a box of unopened graham crackers in my pantry that I can send to get them through Monday, then I can go out that afternoon and purchase snacks for the remainder of the week. I look on the fridge and see the note that requests that a box of baby wipes also be sent with the snack for the week.

Since I don't have a box to spare (you think we would, but we only have one tub, then the refills), I realize I have a sample pack I can send. You know how when you are pregnant they send you Huggies, Pampers, etc...samples of EVERYTHING. So feeling like such a genius I throw the sample pack into the bag with the graham crackers, and quickly scribble a note (using a dry erase marker - the only thing I could find) explaining that I forgot snack, I'm sending what I can and will send more the next day. I throw all this in a plastic grocery sack and stick it in Brett's backpack, give the kids kisses and hugs and send them on their way to the bus stop. Whew.

Fast forward again now to picking Brett up from school. His teacher puts him in the car and looks at me and says "don't stress so much over snack. Oh, and we sent the diaper back." and she gives me a weird look.

I still don't get it. I ramble on for a minute at how I needed wipes, and she looks more confused, but people are behind us so I pull away.

Diaper? What did she mean by diaper?

Oh my God.

That wasn't a sample pack of wipes. It was a sample of a Huggies diaper. I didn't bother to read the label. I hear my son from the back seat about the time of my realization "MOM! Why did you send a diaper to school with me? The teacher gave me a funny look and the class laughed at me". I explained to him my intention and he saw my embarrassment and he realized my faux pa.

Both of us laughed uncontrollably for about ten minutes. I can just imagine the teacher opening a diaper in the middle of class.

Yes, I'm THAT mom.

God is Funny

I don’t think funny is the right word...maybe ironic?

I kind of publicly blasted him the other day. Yes, I was angry at my father God and felt he was not providing for me the way that he should, however I had come to accept that though he may not be providing for me in the best way possible, that as long as he was there to hold me through all my fears I would be ok.

Not even twenty four hours later I received a phone call from a former supervisor at my old job asking me to come back to work for them part time.

Now isn’t that a predicament? Here we are not struggling for money, but tight, and this opportunity arises. It really made me think. Ok God, is this you providing for me, or is this some sort of test?

Last summer after giving birth to Evie, I realized I wanted to stay at home with my kids and invest in their lives. I also came to a realization that things will come and go, but the legacy that I have is in my family and my kids. God was very clear to me in what he taught me. Was I scared to death to go to one income? Yes. Did God always make a way? Yes he did.

I realized what God was saying. He was saying that if money is what is truly important, then sure, go back to work. Then we can get a new roof, get ten root canals if necessary and have enough money left over to furnish our house from Pottery Barn or Crate and Barrel. We can go out every other night to Red Lobster and Olive Garden if we like.

Or...

We could struggle for a while, but look back and see all the wonderful home cooked meals we had at home around our kitchen table. I can be taking a nice evening walk with my kids and see a dresser on the side of the road, in perfect condition. I can take it home, sand it, paint it and make it new all for little or no money and have something artistic that I’m proud of in my home, that has a nice story behind it.

I honestly feel that if I would go back to work I’d be in disobedience to what God wanted me to do last summer. My husband (the wise loving man that he is) immediately saw this. He reminded me of not just the reasons for me to quit sitting here at home, but all the reasons at that job why I wanted to quit. What an awesome great man he is.

Thanks Lord for the swift kick in the pants, I needed it to get motivated once again. You always know how to do that to me and I thank you for it.

A long look back and a glance forward

2007 for me was an amazing year. I'm sad to see it go, sad to see my kids grow so fast, but I look forward in anticipation of what 2008 will hold.

2007 brought with it some big realizations for me. I realized that what I thought my goals and plans were was not what God wanted for me, and when I finally put my selfishness aside, he had a world of happiness awaiting for me.

Of course the biggest highlight for me of this past year was the arrival of Evie. She is everything that we could have hoped for and more. She has filled a void in our family we never would have known about until her arrival. Ginger put it best when we were talking about Ethan and Evie and said that if we would have never gotten pregnant and had her, we would have never missed her. I think that is a really profound statement. However my heart longed for her, and now she is here she has brought so much joy in this family.

I'm so happy to be at home with my children. I'm so happy to be going to school. It feels like such a big accomplishment, and I'm so proud of myself for finally doing it.

2007 was filled with wonderful times with family. I loved having so many of our friends/family from Phoenix come and visit and stay in our home with us. Even though we have a tiny little home it is bursting at the seems with love and lots of fun.

I think I've loosened up (a bit) this year. I still have a lot of work to do on myself about not sweating the small stuff, but God is working on me.

I must say the saddest part of the year was loosing Grandma Miser and Ted. We look forward to seeing them again when we all meet in heaven. Life is short and you don't know when your last day on earth will be, so it made me hug my kids a little tighter and tell my family every day just how much I love them.

In 2008 I hope to....

Loose 10 pounds.
Exercise more.
Find a home church.
Meet some new friends.
Keep a 4.0 GPA in school.
Buy a minivan.
Pay off debt.
Read my bible more.
Quit Smoking!!!! (I'm crossing my fingers that Chantix will work)
Continue telling my family every day just how wonderful they are.
Stress less.
Laugh more.