Kids TV Shows that Drive me crazy

Ok, I have three kids and one on the way, so I have seen my fair share of children's television shows.  There are a few select children's shows that don't grate at my soul, and several I keep around for convenience sake (go away baby...mommy is on Facebook).  

Sid The Science Kid

Some of you may have not seen this show yet.  It started last fall on PBS.  I hate this show.  I hate everything about it, but by far the most annoying thing about this show is the characters.  Sid is annoying enough by himself ("Oh banana why'd you have to go and get all brown and mushy" has become a quite annoying quote that gets repeated in our household more than I'd like).  If you haven't seen the show the premise is this kid wanting to know why things smell, or why bananas get brown etc...Also don't even get me started on how creepy the characters look.

Then you have Sid's friends at school.  I'm not sure what kind of preschool this is with only four children in it you would think they could at least computer generate some background kids or something.  Anyhow, his friends.  You have his ADHD friend that acts a little "special" (Gerald).  Seriously just give the kid some Ritalin* and send him on his way.  Then you have his "hippie" friend that just loves everyone and everything.  Go freaking hug a tree and leave the rest of us normal people alone.  (I swear she is toking it up on the playground behind the monkey bars).  If you have seen the show you will totally understand why I try to avoid this show from airing in my home.  Anyhow watch for yourself if you don't believe me.

*By the way, I do not condone the use of Ritalin...

Dora The Explorer

Ok, I'm not going to get a lot of fans on this one, but I hate the whole pushing Spanish down my kids throat.  I'm all about learning a second language, but it seems everywhere on television they are trying to teach my kid spanish.  Drives me nuts.

Ok, now onto what else annoys me about this show.  Swiper.  Everyone has to look out for Swiper the Fox.  He is supposedly this professional kleptomaniac, that needs to be watched out for.  However, if you want to thwart Swiper all you need to do is yell "SWIPER NO SWIPING" three times and Swiper reluctantly says "AWWW man!" and gives up on his pursuit of the goods.   Wow I had no idea that stopping a bandit was so easy.  So next time someone tries to rob a 7-Eleven, the clerk just needs to yell "no swiping" and it will stop the criminal in his tracks.  

Ok.  Next the map song.  I heard once from a comedian how this must have been written.  Here is how it goes:

The songwriter shows up for a meeting with the team, having forgotten to write the song for the map.

Producer of Dora:  Did you write the song for the map yet?

Songwriter:  Uh, yeah.

Producer:  Can we hear it?

Songwriter:  Uh yeah...I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map, I'm the map!

Need I say more?

Barney

This is one that sticks around my household for the convenience.  Evie LOVES Barney.  Now I could rant on and on about all the annoying things about this show, but I'll stick to the basics.  Just when we finally accepted the fact that our kids loved this big purple dinosaur, they bring along new characters.  Baby Bob.  Talk about adding a whole other annoying factor.  Now they have BJ and Riff.  Riff?   Where the heck did he come from and why do they keep adding annoying characters to this show?  Also the whole we love everybody and everything mushiness of this show just makes me want to puke.

Yo Gabba Gabba

I'm not quite sure when our television shows decided to teach our kids morals, but it really annoys me.  What happened to the good old days of cartoons when a cat was trying to chase and kill a mouse?  Or when a coyote was trying to purchase TNT so he could blow up a roadrunner?  Now all these kids cartoons are watered down.  Yo Gabba Gabba is a friendly acid trip.  I'm not kidding.  They have a song that goes like this "Don't throw things at your friends...don't throw things at your friends", but the characters are all wild and crazy looking (rather freaky if you ask me).  Then they have the guy who comes out and does "The beat of the day".  Here you go...Biz beat of the day...

Wow.  I think this is the worst thing I have ever seen on television.  

These are just the ones off the top of my head.  I'd love to hear your comments and annoyances about kids television shows so leave me some comments!