Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Overwhelmed

I woke up this morning and laid in bed with everything I needed to accomplish today swirling around in my head.  I immediately became overwhelmed.

See, I feel like I should be this super mom, who cleans, cooks, takes care of the kids, and keeps her house in perfect order.

My life is SO not like that.  I have laundry in the basket from two days ago that still needs folded.  I have at least four loads in my closet that need washed.  When I'm done cleaning the kitchen I walk into the living room to see that the dog has chewed up ANOTHER diaper (don't know where he finds these things...) and I have ANOTHER mess to clean up.  While I'm cleaning that mess, I walk in the den to realize that Evie has COLORED ON THE BIG SCREEN with crayon.  In the meantime, Lucy is crying and needs fed, and the dogs are fighting with each other.  I have homework that needs completed, I haven't even showered yet this morning.

I want to just go crawl back in bed, pull the covers over my head, and not come out until June.

Then I HATE myself for feeling angry and overwhelmed.  I begin to feel like a bad mother and housewife for having these emotions.  After all, I decided to stay at home to take care of these things, but I constantly feel that I fall short of "the standard".  I look at other women, and they seem to have it all together, and I constantly feel disheveled and like a complete and total wreck.

When I do give "proper" attention to one area, everything else falls apart.  I have issues with time management.

Is it just me? Am I totally alone here?  I strive to be the "wife of noble character" that is talked about in Proverbs 31, but that standard is so high, how can I possibly ever live up to that?

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